Showing posts with label stream of consciousness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stream of consciousness. Show all posts

Friday, June 27, 2008

Landing In New York... Where it all Will Unleash

Between yesterday and today, I have been feeling very edgy. It might be due to the stress of change. I was not coming here with the smile on my face I expected to arrive with. For a neurotic person like myself, being over the edge is not a good thing.

I hope I find an apartment within a week. I was going to have my first two interviews but I canceled both. I was (and still am) extremely tired. Tomorrow, however, I have two or three interviews for apartments. Let us see how those go.

I have plenty of things to do and I need to organize my time. I need to keep studying for the licensure, send things to the ASWB of New York, and hopefully I won't need to cancel social commitments. I also need to buy a pair of jeans and a good partying shirt.

During my trip in the plane, I was feeling bloated and with stomach pain. And feeling bloated means partially feeling fat.

Ahh and now the reasons about coming to New York (aside for the fact that I have a job and friends here).

My sister was a fan of Sex and The City, and there was some quote in a chapter saying that girls came to New York looking for love, or something like that. But I feel I come to New York in search of my destiny or, to quote Paulo Coelho in The Alchemist, to search and live my personal history. Quoting others aside, I need this time and what is happening to me. My heart is soft and I need to make it hard. I need to defy some of the expectations and conventions society has imposed on me, perhaps in a bigger way than I have been doing so until now.

As I landed, clouds covered New York City. I was feeling as if this was a present I was unwrapping, or as if I was feeling in front of the curtain for this chapter in my life.